Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
