So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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