I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Randomize
