another moral hangover. fuck.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
