so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
