people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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