So drunk its hurt
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm bleeding and have questions
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
