i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He felt like a one man threesome
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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