You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Randomize
