pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
