Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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