Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
