youre lurking in front of me
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
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