I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
me + whiskey = a bad person
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
