Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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