remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
