She said her name was "party"
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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