So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
We need to get me chipped asap
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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