We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Im part way to drunk.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
