Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize
