...so i touched it.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
