How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
