I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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