fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
