bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
