i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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