How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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