Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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