Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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