tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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