I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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