Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Randomize
