maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
