Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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