C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Randomize
