I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
