i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
