I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
they need to just BURY HIM!
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
