Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
