As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
