Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
he was CRYING into my vagina
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
