Don't you send me to vm
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Randomize
