My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
