i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
