I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
