Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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