If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
