hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
