and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
