I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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